What people say…and what they actually mean…
Episode one
The other day I was in the pantry, making
“Actually that one belongs to me”… meaning, “That’s mine, don’t even touch it”.
So as the usual polite boy, I apologised.
“Never mind, that’s alright. We can share”…meaning “Ok, U’ve used mine this time round. The next time it’s your turn to buy a new one”
I apologised again.
“No, no. It’s ok. You didn’t use much anyway.”… meaning “don’t use too much if you didn’t pay for it. If you want to use more, buy it yourself!”
I said, “Oh, ok”…meaning “I’ll take your words for it, minus the pun.”
So till today, I’m still using it, without paying. Haha.
Episode two
I was chatting with “short-skirt” online the other day la. So bored. Then I was asking her if she was free. Then maybe like we can have dinner together or something, haven’t seen her for so long, even though she might not be wearing short-skirts anymore, cos now she’s working in an office. Haha. Ok. Work in office also can wear short-skirts one right.
Anyway, we were chatting la. So I asked if she’s free. I haven’t told her that I want to ask her out la. I just asked if she’s free.
Then she said “yes…what’s up?”… meaning “Ya, I’m free. Are you trying to date me…?”
I said, “oh, nothing.”…meaning “Ok, I’m up to something, but I dun wanna let you know just yet”
Then I added, “aren’t you busy?”… meaning “ok, ok. I’m dating you out…”
She said, “not really…usually in the first two weeks of the month, we’re not that busy”…Meaning “It’s a hint, stupid. I’m available for you to date me anytime during the first 2 weeks of the month! (might mean something else, if you’re lucky)”
So I replied, “Ok… today’s the 8th, does that mean you’ll be able to leave the office at 6 pm?”…meaning, “I’ll see you at 6, at your office building, babe.”
She said, “ya…why? You wanna ask me out for dinner?”…meaing “Ok, I give up… I’ll ask you out instead of you dropping hints all over and not directly asking!”
I said, “Sure… why not?”…meaning “Ok la, I’ll entertain you for a while…”
I also said, “Anyway, my mum’s not cooking dinner tonight…” meaning… “I’ll call home later to tell my mum that I’m not coming home to eat, or maybe even not coming home to sleep. =P”
Ok. So we went to eat at Lau Pasat, had satay and the usual stuffs, fried, steamed (steamed, o.O?!), cooked food, basically. Haha. Then we were talking like… and she asked… “so……” she paused for a moment, as I looked up at her, before she continued. “are you attached?”
I almost choked on my satay meat. What do you mean am I attached? And asking that question was more random than having an aeroplane come crashing down on Lau Pasat. Somehow I managed to calm myself down and mustered the strength to utter the words out from my throat, “Erm… no… why?”
She let out a slight grin and I could see it from the corner of her lips. “nothing. Just asking” Maybe she’s happy, I dunno. Haha. See. The chick magnet has not gone weak after all! Hahahahahaha….
And I asked, “what about you?”. “Nope.” She said.
“Why? Are you les?” I asked again. Her eyes widened and kicked me in the shin. “no la, stupid!” like how a girl would throw tantrums at her boyfriend.
Ok, ok. I got her all excited.
Cool it, girl.
Then for the rest of the night was just like… basically staring into each others’ eyes and flirting with each other la, chit-chatting. No one made any obvious move to go over the boundary.
I offered to send her home and she agreed too, without any hesitation.
THEN… came the time we reached her block. Ok, what to do now?! I’ve not like sent a girl home for so long, that I don’t know how to end here… Erm… like say good bye and then turn and go? Like some old school hero movies, show a few scenes of me turning and don’t look back? Haha. Ok, seriously, I’m lost, can. I hit the button for the lift and watched as the indicator blinked from the 18th floor closer and closer to the 1st floor.
I said, “So…” I paused and took a deep breath. Just as I was thinking of what to say… she turned around and hugged me! She freaking HUGGED me!
Ok, I’m defeated. I went soft. Well… not exactly soft… erm… haha.
Ok, ok. If you’re under 18, please leave now. If you’re over 18, no point continuing reading the story, cos there’s nothing sexual. Haha.
“Thanks for everything tonight” she whispered into my ears. I hate it when people do that, cos it makes me speechless. Lucky she didn’t do anything else… to my ears, at least.
“Well, not at all. In fact, it’s nothing great. It’s just a few satays and some fried rice…”…I felt like saying, “can you please release me now, I’m suffocating…”
“No, no. It’s been great being with you.” she said. I guess it must have been the earthquake in her office that must have shocked her. I never thought we would ever be in this state tonight, holding each other right under her block.
“Ok, it’s late, babe” I purposely added in the word ‘babe’ and made it sound jokingly unserious. “time to go back and sleep”. It was then when she finally let go of her hands and I was about to go into hyperventilation from the hugging.
As gentlemanly possible, I showed her the way to the lift, as if she’s like a stranger and it’s her first time visiting her flat. I don’t want to get into the lift, because I’m sure whatever that will happen. Just like me and Jia Min the other time.
“Aren’t you going to see me up?” she asked.
Alright. She’s dropping hints for me to enter the trap, or lift, rather. No way am I getting in there and make ‘that mistake’. Cleverly, I told her. I said, “Well, I’d loved to. But to be very frank with you, I’ve got to start running after I say good bye when this lift door closes, to catch the last bus home…otherwise…”
I was stopped once again as she got out of the lift and gave me a peck on the cheeks.
“Good night” she said. I froze.
This is too drama. Like hello. Am I watching a drama or wat. I won’t pay a single cent to watch a lousy movie with a sucky story plot like this shit. But it’s happening to me! Wat the..
I watched as the lift door closes, trying to recover from my shock.
Then the vibrations from the phone came. It was an SMS from her. “Thanks for everything and hope you’ve enjoyed your evening too! Sweet dreams and good night. Hope to see you again soon.”
I looked at my watch, realising I was late. I ran like mad and managed to catch the last bus. But when the bus got to Bukit Batok Interchange, there was no more connecting bus home. So I walked home lo.
Scenes of whatever happened earlier on kept replaying in my head. I still can’t believe whatever that was happening.
Was it a beautiful dream or a nightmare?
I don’t know. But I know for sure, I’ll be having a good dream tonight. Hehe.
posted by yang @ 12:59 AM
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